A New Year

Well, it's a new year and I've put off posting until now.  I have dreaded having to write this post and that is why I haven't posted since November.  My sweet boy Gryphon went to his rest a week or so before Xmas holiday.  I was too sad to post for a month or so after he died and then my hard drive died on my netbook and I lost all my photos of him because I can't figure out how to recover info from backups.  I also lost pages and pages of  my thoughts of the day I've collected for years.  Perhaps in the future I will be able to get help to retrieve those but for now I just don't have the brain power to deal with it. 

 

I wrote a little remembrance that I wanted to post here as it just flowed out of my  memory right after Gryphon left.  I lost that too on my computer but fortunately Sue had it on hers.

 

Gryphon has gone to his rest now. I have to tell you it was beautiful. He went out eating cookies! I hope I’m as lucky. Chris and Alana came to the house and he was able to be in his favorite bed laying right next to me eating cookies. He was given a sedative first to relax him and that was a first for me. So much more peaceful. They had a doggie stretcher and when they took him out they wrapped him up in the blanket with his head and forepaws sticking out like he was in a bed! It was SO cute. So much nicer than leaving him on a steel table. Those guys are the absolute greatest.

Today was the day for him to go. The absolute end of what I could care for him. It was the first time he ever refused his food (apparently he was holding out for the cookies) and it took an hour to make it from my bedroom outside so he could relieve himself. I’m so happy he got to sit out in the snow one last time; he loved it so.

I’m thinking of how when he was a mischievous puppy he’d grab the end of the toilet paper roll and unravel it down the hall, how his motto was “why walk when you can run”, how he felt in agility class the A frame was absolutely his alone and no other dog should be allowed to scale it, how he always won quick down musical chairs in obedience class and got to pick prizes from the prize box, how he always asked permission from me if his choice was OK, how he never destroyed his toys or the quilts I made for him on his bed, how he always accompanied me at work, his glorious smile, how we shared ice cream cones and grossed people out taking turns licking it, how he always greeted me at the door with a toy in his mouth and wagging his whole butt because he didn’t have a tail to wag, how he always went on vacation with me in the white mountains and we’d hike trails and take midnight walks at the inn, how he always took it upon himself to be official greeter at the inn when people came in welcoming them with a toy, how gentle he was with Teagan, even as a puppy laying beside her crib while she napped, the tea parties they enjoyed together, politely waiting for his tidbit of cheese and gently lapping from the tiny cups Teagan poured the ‘tea’ water into, how they played bowling bunnies together in the tiny hall, how he loved the snow and if you were shoveling snow in the driveway he followed the shovel until you reached the end of the strip you were shoveling and he wanted you to tip the snow over onto his head while he grinned foolishly, how he loved to bite the spray of water coming out of the hose when I tried to wash the car, how he felt he had to keep the squirrels in the neighborhood in line, how that look came into his eyes when we’d pick up Teagan from summer camp – when he’d see all those children seemingly in random chaos - you could see his mind devising ways to herd them into a neat and orderly group, the glee of anticipating a ride in the car, a meal or when he knew Teagan was coming, how he patiently worked on Crystal to show her he was a good dog, how he knew the meaning of over 200 words, how he slept by the front door waiting for me to come home when we were not together, how he trusted me implicitly and how he loved me.

Cheers for a happy life lived to the fullest always in the moment. He taught me so much and was my absolute best friend ever.

 

Of course I had to include his happy face picture.  I still cry when I look at this picture.  He really kept me happy.  He taught me to live in the moment and to stop and enjoy the moment every day.  I realized this especially since he has been gone.  I've felt like I have been missing a limb or a very important piece of myself.  I miss him at work and every time I walk into the door and he isn't there to greet me.  Even when I wake up, my first act was to reach over and touch him.  My arm still instinctively goes there to reach for him and start my day.

 

So I decided I just cannot live without a furry companion any longer.  I just do not feel complete.  I know I will never be able to replace him.  There will never be another Gryphon.  He was one of a kind and will always be in my heart.  But I know he wouldn't expect me to pine away for him forever so I am opening my heart to another red aussie.  I am scheduled to pick him up this coming weekend and I've been busy preparing for his arrival.  I've ordered his id tag and gotten a little bed for him.  I won't use Gryphon's quilts on his bed until I'm sure he won't destroy them. 

 

When I went to meet him a couple of weeks ago, it was so amazing.  He was licking me and nibbling on my fingers and bumping the other pups away from the corner of the whelping box where I was.  His eye contact with me was incredible and just reminded me so much of my first meeting with Gryphon.  It was as if Gryphon's spirit had moved into this little puppy since he wasn't born until Xmas day.  Now I don't celebrate any holidays but they do serve as markers in time.

 

I look forward to obedience classes asap and agility classes once he is a year old.  I look forward to introducing him to the wonders of the world as I did with Crystal then Teagan then Gryphon.  I love that about kids and dogs.  The living in the moment and experiencing new things.  Aussies are so like kids in that way.  And being so smart, they remember everything.  I'm sure I'll be thinking of and remembering my experiences with Gryphon as my relationship with this new pup grows.  I have decided to name him Zephyr and here is his puppy pic:

 

 

He's a handsome boy with more white than Gryphon but has the white paws I loved so much on Gryphon.  He had good eye contact when I met him and I hope that remains.  I loved when Gryphon's eyes never left me in class.  It was like I was his whole world.

 

So that's it for this first post of the year.  Sad but happy too.  I'm sure there will be lots to post as we get to know each other and I'll be posting Zephyr's antics and adventures here in my blog.

 

Thought for the day:  Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole -- Roger Caras